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Posted in The Beginning

A Novelist In The Making

The aim: more finished writing projects this year please!

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Posted in progress, writing

Illustrating

I haven’t been well lately so I’ve stayed away from the blog.  Tonight I’ve dabbled with illustrating my 1st project.  I know, to an extent, how I want the look of the book to be and so with the help of my trusty laptop I’ve tampered with background colours and faces.  It’s a bit hit and miss, I’m not known for my illustrations but it’s been nice to get back into the swing of things.

Check back soon as I’m looking for my next project and with having some spare time during the day tomorrow I’m hoping to crack on with some more exciting stories.

 

 

Posted in personal

Primary School Disappointment

I don’t normally post about things external to the usual blogging topics but I feel I need to express my motions and motivations as it’ll probably affect my blog ongoing.

Today I found out my son’s primary school offer and was absolutely devastated.  He got offered 3rd choice and that choice was pretty much a “hope it never comes to it” as there aren’t that many good schools in the area.

So here I am.  I’ve cried all day and I had waited such a long time to even get to this point. I’m sick of feeling disappointment.

It should have been an exciting day.

I should have been celebrating with my children today.

I should have been looking up school uniforms and the next process today.

I should have been messaging everyone how happy we were.

But none of that happened.

It was a traumatic day.

I barely spoke to my eldest about the results.

I’ve spent the whole day fretting and feeling anxious and also like a bad parent for clearly aiming too high for a school, ironically thinking it was the safest option all around.

I am terrified for September and the whole process of appealing and waiting lists.

So I ask myself.  What did I do wrong? How the hell are there 30 children in the same area of the same age who have preference over my eldest? what advantages did they have that ruled us out? I live 300 metres away!

I’m angry, irritated, frustrated, gutted, disappointed, worried, stressed, scared and now tired.  I honestly didn’t see this coming.  I had been bigging up his 1st and 2nd choice school for nearly 6 months and we drove past the school where he got an offer and he got upset and said he didn’t want to go there.  More guilt on my part now.

I now have a fight on my hands, a lot more anxiety to come, more patience, more waiting around, more checking my emails every 5 minutes hoping something good will happen.

I feel like I’ve let my son down massively, not to mention his brother. I wish I could have offered more for them in terms of schools.

A lot of people have tried to reason with me today and as grateful as I am for the support I’m in no mood to be reasoned with.  I am definitely not in that head space. My only glimpse of hope is that something better will come along – but that may only lead to more disappointment.

All in all, a very devastating start to the week.  And my children’s future.

This is in no way an attack on those who chose my son’s offered school as a first choice and got accepted, this is purely disappointment on my husband and I’s part.  If I can fight then I will.  This is about ensuring our children get a good start by sending them to a school which we feel would help provide that.

 

Posted in progress, writing

Project 4 – First Draft Update

Tonight, with a husband pushing me to write, I finished the first draft of Project 4.  It’s lengthy which I didn’t want, mostly because it’s a rhyming story aimed at young children and at nearly 600 words I doubt they’d have the attention span to sit through that much of a story.

I have no other projects lined up currently, I have fallen out of the writing recently but I guess I now need to go back to the first 3 projects and edit them to pieces and then crack on with number 4 and wait for my next inspiration.